Funniest thing you read today

With the 1 percent’s abandonment of its traditional patronage role, it should be obvious to us more than ever that our prospects are intrinsically connected to the 99 percent. At the same time, it should also be apparent that many of the barriers preventing the kind of multi-class alliance we need are of our own creation. Our reflexive tendency to consign to “a basket of deplorables” those whose tastes, musical and otherwise, and cultural sensibilities fail to comport with the arbitrary dictates of educated elites is one of the most conspicuous of these.

Breaking this unattractive habit doesn’t require that we take any great pleasure in listening to Kenny G. Rather, all that is necessary when interacting with those who do is to remember the old kindergarten adage that one should either say something nice or nothing at all.

If we are to take seriously our goal of developing a social base for a mass left politics, that is a sacrifice we should all be willing to make. Joining the millions of others already floating their cares away to the cool, smooth tones of Kenny Gorelick might not be everyone’s idea of a socialist utopia, but it’s pretty easy to imagine a lot worse.

Austrian public broadcaster ORF added a bizarre touch to the swearing-in of the new conservative-Green coalition government when it mistakenly ran subtitles from a telenovela.

The incident went viral Wednesday after it mistakenly aired with soap opera subtitles of "Alisa – Follow Your Heart," suggesting he was offering the president a job as a cleaning lady.

Facebook Is Forcing Its Moderators to Log Every Second of Their Days — Even in the Bathroom: “People have to clock in and clock out even when going to the toilet and explain the reason why they were delayed, which is embarrassing and humiliating.”

Used to work for a company who did this. The staff rebelled by taking it way overboard and clocking out for every tiny thing. Stuff like "Dropped pen. Picking it up." Or "Couldn't find glasses. Realised they were on my head."

Once the management realised that they had to wade through all this tedious crap and didn't have time to do much else, they soon swept the whole idea under the rug.

Spend 5 minutes looking for pen.

Spent 1 minute updating production log.

Spent 1 minute logging previous activity.

Spent 1 minute logging previous activity of logging previous activity.

We have now learned that during the same period he wanted to discuss joining the ICC, he took part in and was the main animator in Spain of the tendency called cyberpunk, and a promoter of cyber activism

This might have been posted already but I came across it today.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=libcom

libcom
A "libertarian communist" forum. Full of self-righteous idiots with their heads up their asses. Not really anarchists, mostly just closet Marxists who don't understand the concept of disagreement
libcom user 1: Jolly mate, do you agree with Bakunin's theory of XYZ?

libcom user 2: FASCIST!!!!

Kliman vigorously condemned the crimes of Stalinism and “leftist” support and apologetics for them, saying that they have besmirched the cause of genuine socialism, setting it back decades–if not permanently. Riley said that “mistakes” had been made, but he refrained from condemning Stalinist regimes. Wolff also refrained from even the slightest condemnation of them, attacked Kliman personally, and alleged that leftist opponents of Stalinism had done the most harm to the cause of socialism (presumably more than Pol Pot’s killing fields, the crushing of the Hungarian Revolution, etc., etc.). A fourth speaker, graduate student Bennett Shoop, also put forward a pro-Stalinist line.

What did the Trotskyist do when he found his wife in bed with another man?

Try to sell him a paper.

(It is also perhaps true to say that the fact that one of the defendants, who had several previous convictions, had skipped bail, with our prior knowledge, and hadn't helped matters by ringing up Walmsiey, a judge whom he knew of old, on the morning, of the trial and giving his name. "Why aren't you in court this morning?" asked RM Albert. "You have to catch me first, motherfucker" was the rejoinder, which, however apposite. may not have done his co-defendants any good.)

So as an anarcho capitalist I understand that it’s not only moral, but is also absolutely natural that I live as an entirely independent being. I rely on nobody in any way shape or form. I am capable, I am strong, I need nobody else.
I did not need some false ideology like all you socialists, as I say, my philosophy comes straight from nature. And so, the moment I was born, I told my mom to keep her fucking commie titties to herself and started to drink from my own.
I now only eat food I grew myself on land that I worked with tools I made myself with metal I forged myself from the raw materials I mined myself.
I drive a car a built myself powered by fuel I refined from oil that I dug for and struck for myself. Obviously I only drive on roads I laid myself so if I’m going somewhere new I lay ten feet of road, drive to the edge, get out of my car and lay another ten feet of road and so on. Takes a long ass time to get anywhere but it sure beats being a weak ass, soy girl commie cucktard like all you so called ‘anarchists’ on this page.
I only came on this World Wide Web so I could tell you snowflake commies how pathetic you are but I’m getting off it now. I don’t need this shit, I’m gonna build my own.

This article on the Irish cement strike has a bunch of great sections like this:
...
http://libcom.org/library/great-irish-cement-strike-1970-fe-3-c-cement

The destruction of 27 lorries by person or persons unknown ended the lorry running from Armagh, but the habit had spread unfortunately to Newry where five cement loads were destroyed. Here it is true to say that it was perhaps more due to the zeal of the Newry fire brigade who were summoned on several occasions to parked cement lorries which were, they were informed by local bystanders, on fire. In vain did the drivers protest that this was not so and that the token fire had been extinguished.

The stern-faced and diligent Newry fire brigade, all union members, solemnly hosed down five loads of cement, inadvertently destroying them, but doubtless saving the town from a mighty conflagration.